How to Help Your Child Juggle Sports, School, and Life
Set Priorities
The first thing you and your child need to do is set priorities: Sit down together and list the important elements in your child's life. Explain to your child that family comes first, schoolwork second, and sports third. "But sports is a big third," says Ron Moyer, guidance counselor and girls' basketball coach at Amherst (Massachusetts) Regional High School. "Sports are going to take a lot of time and energy."
Most kids will quickly agree that their families are more important than sports. But, as parents, you must make sure your child understands that schoolwork is also ahead of sports on the priority list. If your child objects, explain that his chances of earning a college sports scholarship or a pro contract are extremely remote, says Robert S. Kanaby, executive director of the National Federation of State High School Associations. Parents must "allow kids to pursue their [athletic] hopes and dreams," while not forgetting that education comes first, says Kanaby.
Get Real
Once priorities have been established, you and your child should work out daily, weekly, and season-long schedules. First, make a list of your child's after-school activities, athletic and otherwise, in order of importance. Then decide how much time will be required for each activity--homework, piano lessons, practice, games, and driving to and from all of the activities. Once you have a realistic view of what you are dealing with, help your child work out a schedule that makes time for everything.
Moyer suggests setting aside a fixed period every day for homework. During that time, turn off the TV and hold all calls. If the child finishes homework, he can use the remaining time to read or work on future assignments.
Ellen Wilkins is the mother of three successful scholar-athletes, ages 8, 12, and 15. The family lives in South Burlington, Vermont. Wilkins encourages her kids to get their most difficult homework assignments done early, before late-afternoon practices. "Kids work better when they're fresh," says Wilkins. Wilkins sometimes incorporates an hour of study time into play-dates when friends come over to visit her kids.
Communicate
Communication among coaches, athletes, parents, and teachers is essential for striking a balance between sports and studies.
Coaches can help make academics a student's number 1 priority by making sure that practice and game schedules don't interfere with the school day. For example, the bus should not leave for an away game before classes have ended. And evening games should be scheduled for Friday or Saturday night so that athletes can recover over the weekend.
Parents should let coaches know as soon as possible if an athlete must miss a practice or a game--for a doctor's appointment, makeup exam, or religious holiday, for example. Coaches should try to adjust their schedules accordingly. If schedules can't be changed, athletes, parents, and coaches should discuss how missed practices and games might affect the child's standing on the team. Parents can be good role models by setting priorities at home and sticking to them. A parent who promises to spend only three hours at the office on the weekend should keep his word.
Good scholar-athletes should also be held up as role models. Parents should urge schools to give special awards to athletes who maintain high grade-point averages.
A Privilege, Not a Right
"Participation in our sports program is a privilege, not a right," says Jerry Parrish, head of the physical education department at North Kitsap High School, in Poulsbo, Washington, and executive secretary of the Washington State Coaches Association. "Athletes need to meet their responsibilities, including keeping up their schoolwork."
Parrish meets with parents and students before a season begins. He outlines his expectations for students and suggests ways in which parents can help their children succeed, academically and athletically.
The athletic programs at North Kitsap High monitor the schoolwork of student-athletes. A student who falls behind may have to get help from a tutor until he raises his grades to an acceptable level. And if the school fails to take action, the parents as a group should set up a system of realistic consequences for student-athletes who fall behind in their schoolwork.
Don't Be Afraid to Blow the Whistle
Sometimes parents have to make tough calls, such as limiting the number of sports a child plays per season. Kanaby warns parents to be mindful of out-of-school "elite," "all-star," or travel teams, which can overburden students. "You can't expect your child to go to school all day, practice afterward, then play three hours with an elite organization and maintain a healthy lifestyle and a productive educational program," says Kanaby. If your child does play on such teams, says Kanaby, you should let the coach know your expectations and limits.
Balancing the demands of school and sports isn't easy. But your child will benefit by developing time-management skills. These skills not only will help your child study better and play better, but they will also serve your child long after his or her days as a scholar-athlete have ended.
Help Your Kids Strike a Balance
This information is brought to you by FamilyEducation Network in partnership with Sports Illustrated for Kids.
