What's The Deal With Parents?
I think that any athlete can think of an example where a parent has gone over the line when it comes to their child's involvement in sports. I know personally that I have seen everything from a parent yelling at a coach during a game to heated confrontations in the locker room after practice. Parent s need to learn to relax and let their child enjoy the sport that they are playing and just let them play.
As it says in "Towards an Understanding of Parent Spectator Behavior at Youth Sport Events", we aren't certain what it is that causes parents to act out during their child's athletic career (Omli, LaVoi, Bjornstal 2008, pg.33). I was always lead to believe that parents that either had great success or wish that they had great success in sports were the ones that were very "active" in their kids sports life. I'm not trying to say that parents shouldn't be involved in their kid's sports career. I think that they can be as supportive and encouraging as they want as long as it isn't causing harm to the player's mental state. When parents push their kids too far and they turn something that is supposed to be fun and pure into a life or death situation, that's when they need to stop and walk away from being involved in their child's sport.
I found a really great example of a parent being too involved in their kid's game and highly recommend that you check it out to understand how bad some parents have gotten when it comes to being spectators http://www.youtube.com/watchv=cTTTUBDx_28&feature=related
I have always wondered though, how do the children of over-involved parents feel when their pushed so hard by their parents. When posed with this question, most children just want to have a parent that is there supporting them whether the outcome is good or bad and to not be that "crazy fan" in the stands that embarrasses not only themselves, but their kid at the same time (Omli, LaVoi, Bjornstal 2008).
Another reason why I believe that parents push kids their kids to perform well during sports is because of all the riches and rewards that could come with being the best athlete amongst his or her peers (Anderson, Aberman 2006, pg.15). It starts when their kids are younger and they're developing the skills it takes to play the game. Parents think that by getting involved early and often, this will give kids a head start in front of all the other kids. Then in high school, parents begin pushing to get their kid to stand out more so they can get a starting spot on a varsity team. College tuition is steadily climbing and parents know that if their kid can get a scholarship playing sports it will help them out immensely financially. After that, it'll be a push to try and get to the pros where they will be making huge paychecks and living the good life. What's wrong with that picture? There isn't a single mention about the kids having fun and enjoying themselves while playing sports. When parents focus too much on the extrinsic rewards, they lose sight of what their child wants through sports and it destroys any passion that they might have for the game.
Parents need to understand that sports don't just revolve around them. Showing interest in their child's athletic career is perfectly alright. As a matter of fact I encourage it and think that they need to be there for their kids, but as a spectator only. They are not the ones that are out on the field or court playing so they need to act like it. They should help when help is needed and cheer when the situation calls for cheering, but they need to understand what the difference is between a supportive parent and an over-bearing one.
